What is abuse? In a relationship, there are ups and downs – sometimes people say and do things to each other that are not nice. But there’s a difference between normal arguing and abusive, frightening behaviour in the home, which is called domestic violence. Abuse is when one person hurts or bullies another person. Domestic violence is when this abuse happens between two people in a family or between two people who are dating, living together, married or have children together (for example: between parents, boyfriend and girlfriend or between lesbian or gay couples). Usually men are the abusers and women are the victims (the ones getting hurt), but domestic violence can happen to men as well. Sometimes another member of your family might be the abuser; it’s possible that your mum, your brother or sister, your grandparent or your foster parent might be hurting someone in your family. Domestic violence doesn’t always have to be physical; it can also include emotional abuse, financial abuse and sexual abuse. Many of these behaviours are crimes (against the law). Examples of domestic abuse Physical Abuse Shaking, smacking, punching, kicking, presence of finger or bite marks, starving, tying up, stabbing, suffocation, throwing things, using objects as weapons, female genital mutilation, ‘honour violence’. Physical effects are often in areas of the body that are covered and hidden (i.e. breasts and abdomen)

Sexual Abuse Forced sex, forced prostitution, ignoring religious prohibitions about sex, refusal to practice safe sex, sexual insults, sexually transmitted diseases, preventing breastfeeding. Psychological Abuse Intimidation, insulting, isolating a woman from friends and family, criticizing, denying the abuse, treating her as an inferior, threatening to harm children or take them away, forced marriage. Financial Abuse Not letting a woman work, undermining their efforts to find work or to study, refusing to give money, asking for an explanation of how every penny is spent, making her beg for money, gambling, not paying bills. Emotional Abuse Swearing, undermining confidence, making racist marks, making a woman feel unattractive, calling her stupid or useless, eroding her independence Page 1 of 2 <Next>